“1 in 5 children will be abused before their 18th birthday. In the United States this would be the entire Pacific and Mountain time zones’ population combined. Most children know their abusers- 34% are family members, 59% are acquaintances, and only 7% of perpetrators are strangers. Too many parents have a false sense of security and minimize the possible threats in front of them.”
Here’s an insightful video from Justin and Lindsey Holcomb, authors of Rid of My Disgrace and God Made All of Me, on helping parents and caregivers learn steps they can take to keep their children safe.
The middle road HAVEN is trying to walk just isn't tenable. They cannot be both pro-victim advocacy and pro-PRC (endorsed by leadership). These are mutually exclusive things. When one grapples with the sheer amount of injustice perpetuated and covered up (if not perpetrated and covered up), then you can see where criticality of leadership and anger are reasonable, even called for. If you want to give victims a voice, then you have to be prepared to give victims a real, unfiltered voice and therefore critical of their experience in the PRC and how the church wronged them. HAVEN is just not prepared to do that. At least, they are not prepared to do that and still be in a position where they are considered pro-PRC and endorsed by leadership. What HAVEN wants is to help, which is noble. But the reality that includes the subtext is that HAVEN wants to help as long as the victim isn't vocal about specifics of where the PRC screwed up and which PR ministers/professors/elders have done poorly and the real damage the church is doing. As long as HAVEN tries to walk the middle ground, their help comes with strings. That's just the way it is. If there's a victim who is critical of the PRC, such as Heidi, HAVEN will tolerate them up to the point where it endangers their reputation in the PRC, after which they'll just block them and disavow. It's the way it was always bound to turn out.
ReplyDeleteWe are doing our best to help victims by helping them use their voice. HAVEN exists to educate the Protestant Reformed community on how to identify, stop, and prevent domestic and sexual abuse while offering help and support for those currently experiencing it. We are not trying to upend the PR leadership but give a voice to the voiceless.
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