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Domestic Abuse Advocate Help - Part 1

Advocates can help domestic abuse victims in many ways. (Although an advocate in a conservative church community probably wouldn’t help a victim purchase a bus pass, she might help arrange transportation in other ways such as finding rides for kids to and from counseling, or connecting the victim with a free oil change.)

The graphic encompasses the two ways we can think about advocacy. An advocate is a “really educated friend” and an advocate often acts as a case manager.
An advocate is not a counselor, but a domestic abuse advocate is trained in and familiar with the dynamics and impacts of domestic abuse…which is why we say they are “a really educated friend”. An advocate is there to help you process your feelings and offer an outside perspective, which can often lend clarity to the issue at hand. An advocate will not give instructions to the victim or make decisions for her, rather, the advocate will offer options, choices, and information, and only share opinions or advice if asked. The victim is in the drivers’ seat.
An advocate acts as a case manager particularly during her first few conversations with the victim. For instance, the advocate will ask the victim “Does your family know what’s going on? If not, do we need to have a conversation with them?” “Did you get paperwork from the court?” “Are you safe at home right now or do you need a place to go temporarily?” “How are your finances? Do we need to reach out to the deacons?” “Have you talked to your pastor and/or elders about this?” “How are your kids? Have informed the teachers that you are separated?” “Do you need to speak with a lawyer?” The advocate doesn’t just ask the questions, but follows up by sharing contact information, composing emails, arranging meetings, attending meetings with the victim, connecting her with resources, and generally doing what she can to prevent overwhelm and shoulder some of the burden. The advocate tries to think ahead about everything that needs to be done, and sometimes it’s as simple as “Can I take that off your plate?”
Do you have a heart for domestic abuse victims and a desire to come alongside and bear their burdens? We would love to have you join HAVEN as an advocate. Please contact us at info@havenofmercypr.org for training requirements and more information


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