Advocates do not assume the role of savior, but rather, they point victims to their Savior by responding to the victim in ways that are in direct opposition to abuse.
(Note: although this month we are focusing on spousal domestic abuse, the same idea can be applied to the interactions between sexual abuse victims and their advocates.)
Abuse tears down…advocates build up.
Abuse is intentional shaming…advocates say “There is no shame in…”
Abuse is domination and control…advocates say “Would you like me to…?” and “You are in the drivers’ seat.” and “What do you think about…?”
Abuse is deception and lies…advocates speak truth and interact with integrity.
Abuse is darkness…advocates help the victim bring abuse into the light.
Abuse is manipulation…advocates never use the vulnerability of the victim to “gain the upper hand” or control/direct her life.
Abuse makes you feel as if you have no value…advocates remind the victim of her identity in Christ, of her value as a daughter of the King, as a woman in the church, a mother, a friend, a fellow believer.
This manner of interacting is intentional, but also sincere.
Although we are talking about how advocates interact with victims, these responses in opposition to abuse are also something to keep in mind for friends, family, and the church institute.
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